Listening to my Disney Pandora while I get dressed and I have to tell you, Cinderella wakes up much more gracefully than I do. She’s like singing and birds are hanging out. I can’t find matching socks and am pretty sure I have peanut butter all over my face.
"we almost dated" is such a weird relationship to have with someone
Plus the sequel “we never got closure”
And then the side adaptation “as a result I have a weird crush that never died”
all I know
If there’s one thing I will never understand, it’s the front covers of textbooks.
"Gentleman, how can we best create a cover that displays the core concepts of chemistry and summarizes the contents of the subject?"
"Let’s put a guy with a surfboard on it."
"Fucking brilliant, Jim."